The Perfect 34th Birthday Gift…. A Blank Slate

What an interesting day!  This is the birthday I have been talking about for years!  It may seem random looking forward to my 34th but it is significant to me.

As a young single mum, I had people believing I wouldn’t do a good job or that my life would be over because of it, well I can stand up and say I’ve made it.  In the same way you look to your 16th birthday from 1st year at senior school, feeling it will take forever to get there, as an adult, 34 was it for me.  16 means somewhat “freedom”.  The first step to adulthood.  You can “legally” have sex.  You can “officially” get a job.  It’s a new lease of life and learning.

Well for me, when I was 18 I found that I was pregnant for my high school sweetheart and he was not happy about it.  He didn’t want me to have him but I weren’t killing my baby for no one!  So me and my son have been on an interesting journey together.  Now for my son reaching that 16 mark I earlier described is during my 34th year of life.

34 to me is like being 16 all over again… I have given my son practically all of me.  Having a small, to near enough non existent support system, jobs and careers I wanted to get into that I couldn’t pursue long term, if at all, because I didn’t want to be away from him too much at times when I feel I should have been home.  I have known what it was like to hardly see my mum because before she went through an illness during my younger years, she was always at one of her two jobs.  So I have made a lot of sacrifices for the love of my son and tried to be the best mum I could be with the time and resources I had and have.  No matter the circumstances .

Some of the things I can look forward to as individual are:

  • Pursuing roles I couldn’t do before without having to worry about childcare in any way shape or form
  • Going on short breaks in the middle of term time
  • Focusing on my health and fitness without having to worry too much about the attention it may bring because I know and love myself better than when I was 18.
  • Most importantly, enjoying my new stage of motherhood!!!!

My son fills my heart with so much joy.  Words really couldn’t describe the love I have for him.  I am looking forward to the stage we will step into together.  I will be able to support him through his adulthood in a way in which I wasn’t.  I have tried to ensure we have as open a relationship as possible so he can feel comfortable talking to me about anything with transparency on my part, as it’s good for any relationship.  So I am happy that there are still things we will be able to do together while helping him grow as an individual.  I want to see him win and hopefully we will win together.  He is my son and I can call him a friend because we have been through so much together.

So why the blank slate???? This is the first birthday I can remember having snow which I find to be symbolic.  Recently, considering I had everything figured out a couple months ago, there has been quite a few changes leaving me in a state of limbo:

  • I done well in the first year of my Spa Management degree and was excited for the second but I started back and they changed one the management modules to a practical.  That may not sound like a big thing to someone else but it really was because before we broke up they told us that the practical would be management within the spa setting.  Perfect!  Who would complain about that?  That’s what we’re working towards isn’t it?  But no, Advanced Consultations…. really???  I was not happy!  Manager … no!  Fancy therapist…. yes!
  • I am trying to change my course rather than waste time and MONEY on a degree I believe to not even guarantee a management role as I would still be working my way up regardless.  I’m currently just going back and forth with the uni trying to get a meeting to discuss my possible change to Hospitality Business Management.
  • The company I paid to do my Level 3 Beauty Therapy offer 3 years career support as they have partners with reputable companies within the industry with whom you are guaranteed interview and I haven’t had one yet! That is not down to a lack of trying with or  without them.  On my part, being newly qualified in any field it is difficult to get your first job without practical experience.  On their part, I feel that the way they’ve been advertising as if they train you up to work for their partners is possibly a con.
  • I’m definitely working towards self employment, whether part or full time.  I have just have a few things to take care of first such as getting my driving licence and money to get my kits together.
  • I booked a Floating Spa experience for my birthday today for the first time and had to reschedule due to the weather.

To bring it all home, this birthday is bittersweet.  Everything I have been working on externally has been thrown into temporary disarray.  On the other hand, I have 3 generations in my house today.  My mum who had me at 17 reminiscing about my birth, with me and my young man in training all going forward in this life together.  As long as home is good, then I’m good.

So I thank you all for coming through and feel free to comment and share your own experiences.

Forever learning and evolving,

Elisha xxx

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It’s All About Me

Hi all and thank you for coming to join me lol!

I just thought I’d introduce myself to you all so you know a little bit about me and hopefully you come and join me on my journey through life:

I am a Spa Management student who has just completed her first year at university who desires to break into the industry and would also like to go mobile.  I have had loads of work experience in all different fields over the years including hospitality, health and social care,  and property.  I even launched a business a couple years ago prematurely if I’m being honest with you.  In hindsight, I wasn’t fully prepared so initially I went to university to study Business Enterprise but I found it wasn’t stimulating enough for me so I transferred my degree to the one I’m on now and absolutely love it!

During this summer, I am doing a paid 10 week internship with Project Brum via Birmingham City Council to help promote health, fitness and wellbeing around Birmingham.  This will be good for me as health and fitness complements the treatments that we provide within a spa environment.  I am also doing an intensive course for me to complete my Level 2 and Level 3 in Beauty Therapy via The Training Room alongside my internship separately for 12 weeks.  I invested in this in order to improve my employability.  Going into the industry as a “mature” non therapist is difficult as you are required to have a Level 3 even as a Spa Receptionist. So I thought this may help me find a job within a spa setting so I can see first hand how they are run, and also so I don’t lose my skills.

On a personal note, I’m a 33 year old mother to an amazing 14 year old son who was diagnosed with Aspergers in 2015 and we have been fighting with the school to have him supported how he should.  Horrible feeling when other people don’t love and care for your child like you do.  Single at present and very busy but I make time for whatever and whoever I feel is important.  Currently working on my fitness and enjoying my life as much as possible no matter what the circumstance.

Now you know me,  I want to get to know you too.  Feel free to share your stories with me and one another.  We can inspire each other.

Forever learning and evolving,

Elisha xxx